In a post on my Facebook wall today, legendary comedian and writer David Brenner wrote, "I understand everything you have done and been, with one exception and, that is, why would you ever let yourself become a comedian?" I don't fully understand the word "let". The fact that such an iconic comedy pioneer responded to a schmuck like me makes me feel like I'm doing something right, or at least making people think. I appreciate the input Mr. Brenner.
I started my professional comedy career (although I still haven't got a manager/booking agent) in 2005. It was 3 months before my 41st birthday and I had wanted to try stand-up comedy before turning 40. I signed up for an open mic night at Barrel' O Laughs featuring Bill Brady in Oak Lawn, just outside the city with days to spare. It was Chicago's longest running comedy venue. The rules were simple. No f-word, n-word, c-word,or p-word. I was cool with that because I think the shock value of those words have taken over the crafting of a good joke. It just isn't necessary.
My love of making people laugh was probably my first addiction. Outwardly I was a happy child growing up in a difficult existence. My parents got divorced when I was two and my sister was five. Our apartment was tiny almost motel-like and a single mother with kids was stigmatized in those days. I would do anything to make a relative, friend or stranger laugh. My mom worked all the time and entertaining myself and others was no problem. The sound of someone laughing at me and my antics drove me. When my mom came home from a long day it was showtime and I would make her laugh until she got mad at me. I felt those laughs in every fiber of my body. It was euphoric and I wanted more all the time.
By the time I started kindergarten at Carpenter Street School in the heart of Mokena, I had a whole new audience. The classroom and playground were like Broadway and Vegas to me. As the laughs grew I got more frantic by saying and doing crazy physical comedy and impressions of kids, teachers and movie stars.
I was happiest in front of a crowd. Once someone asked me how I'm able to stand up in front of so many people and not be terrified. I replied that the terror didn't exist when there wasn't a crowd to entertain but when I was alone with my racing thoughts. Being named class clown in elementary school and high school were my official entries in school newspapers and yearbooks. Every laugh released endorphins in me and I needed more and more. I would definately be put on Ritalin if I was a child growing up now.
As I took the stage that night, the Chicago Tribune was there and wrote a feature story on me based on people taking chances in their 40's and older. The article was titled "First Time Comic Stands up to His Fears and Takes the Stage." September 22, 2006. That added to my terror and made me quite the popular guy with the other comics. I am grateful to say I was sober that night. I was afraid I would forget my material if I was drunk. Bill Brady took me to the side before I went on and said, "Don't worry, we have very low expectations for you." It was priceless and loosened me up. I hit the stage and was blinded by the spotlight in my eyes. I remember thinking what a great idea that was to prevent me from being nervous from seeing the crowd. I later learned that's exactly why it was there.
I heard the first laugh at my words and I was hooked. My set was to last seven minutes and I did twenty. I had no idea what the blue light at the rear of the club was flashing for. I thought it was blinking to let the waitress know her order was ready for pick up so I just kept ripping one joke after another. I wrapped up my set with a joke about Jesus coming back to earth as a union carpenter and being asked to turn a sausage into a thousand sausages at the company picnic. I didn't fail. I wouldn't call it a kill but I felt euphoria. I commented to the reporter that it was like climbing Mount Everest - pure adrenalin.
I think art chooses the artist. Unfortunately my models of comic and material success were guys like Richard Pryor, Steve Martin, John Belushi and Ernest Hemingway. Johnny Carson and Dean Martin always had a cocktail in hand. The dark side of comedy was attractive to me and I planned on following in their steps. Those guys partied hard after they were famous. I was content for many years with the party but the darkness and the material success never arrived. I just drank and used and thought of all the jokes I was gonna write - tomorrow.
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